We have a new president now, and public opinion, if you can believe it, is divided.
Some are celebrating what they see as a final victory against “woke culture,” convinced that the new administration will return our country to a supposed greatness that has been lost.
Others fear a slide into despotism, a restriction of hard-won freedoms, and a regressive, exclusive future.
As you might expect, I’m somewhere in the middle, and I carry with me a message from “middle America”: we all need to loosen up a bit! I don’t care whether you’re on the left or right, liberal or conservative, straight or gay, male, female, or transgender – as someone who exists in this country, indeed on this planet, I value you. I recognize that you have struggles and dreams and desires just like I do. It is right and just that you should advocate for yourself and your interests. But I must take this opportunity to remind everyone that the more rigid you are, the more easily you break.
Our knowledge and assumptions are always incomplete. No one is an expert in everything. Few, in fact, are experts in anything! Many would have you believe they are experts by virtue of being rich or powerful. And because we are preoccupied by our own personal challenges, we are susceptible to slogans and buzzwords, to charismatic personalities who make big promises but have no accountability. This is true of all political parties, who are led, it seems, not by the most honest, but by the shrewdest and slickest. Those in power know that the easiest way to stay in power is to keep us fighting amongst ourselves, leaving us too angry, exhausted, and disoriented to pose any threat.
This is why we must adopt the Middle Way. I don’t mean we should all be moderates. When I say “middle,” I refer to the position occupied by the peacemaker, the listener, and the friend. I’m talking about the mindset best evoked by the Ancient Roman playwright Terence, once a slave, who wrote, “Nothing human is alien to me.” We need to cultivate our innate humanity, vulnerability, and curiosity to create options that work for everyone. We need to remember that we are all on the same team.
Don’t choose sides – get curious! The challenges we face in this world are complex and interdependent. It is characteristic of the selfish and tribal to see a problem as something to be “eliminated” or “done away with,” but this kind of thinking leads to nothing but scapegoating. Those who follow the Middle Way know that addressing global challenges is not simple, and that anyone trying to convince you otherwise likely has ulterior motives.
Do not limit yourself by identifying too strongly with any representative of our flawed political system. You contain multitudes. Reflect deeply on your personal beliefs. Examine where they come from and whether they are still serving you and the rest of humanity. Be willing to listen more deeply and curiously to people who think and act differently from you.
When you begin to feel that the beliefs, culture, and systems in your community have shifted too far one way or the other, pause before you react. Lean into your fear, don’t bury it. Ask yourself whether your anxiety is justified, and consider the possibility that what you are feeling came from elsewhere – perhaps from a person or group that stands to benefit from your anxiety. Talk about what’s worrying you with your friends and loved ones. Be vulnerable; open the door to real conversations, the kind that might end in a different place than where they began. Avoid projecting your fears onto others who hold an opposing view.
This is what I call the Middle Way. It is not a compromise; I’m not asking you to abandon your beliefs. But I urge you to replace doom-scrolling and echo chambers with reflection and conversation. Let your fears breathe a little instead of keeping them pent up and seething. Be gentle with your neighbors and curious about their lives. Learn to find connection and validation in the people you see every day, rather than seeking it in TV talking heads and politicians who don’t even know your name. The Middle Way is not only a more pleasant way to live; it represents a pragmatic approach to both personal responsibility and positive systemic change. At least, it’s worth a shot.
If you need help navigating this confusing time, or are interested in orienting from a place of curiosity, send me an email at ralph@getemergent.com.
Comments (2)
Ralph, from time to time I read your letters. I think you make little sense. You are 67 years old give or take. You need to take a position and not waver on subjects that are quite obvious. You are unwilling to step up to the plate if you will. I have lost friendships because people discarded me because I fully support Trump. I worked on federal contracts for years, and saw the mess of that town. I also know how people make money dishonestly because it is pervasive on small businesses. This is not about politics it is about integrity. The decline in integrity is pervasive. I also can tell you there are two sexes. There are men and women. There might be people born with some combination but this is very rare. Lets face it, the Ten Commandments make sense. I have told you before, just print them and that might help everyone more than these 1980s style summary viewpoints.
Thank you Ralph, for your article on the Middle Way. It was beautifully expressed and, for me, reflects a message that many are striving to share—that there is an alternative way rather than firmly holding onto our own viewpoints. I hope we start to witness a shift in humanity, where we can all be kinder to each other without compromising our own values.